Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Five signs your career is undergoing the zombie apocalypse…

I had a fantastic conversation with my boss this week joking about how shows like “The Walking Dead” are kind of a funny analogy for work.  Well, we were laughing but it’s probably not that funny if you are in a dystopic professional state...but hey, no one said this blog is for SERIOUS advice.

Anyway, it got me thinking about how when you sense the zombie virus is invading your career….it’s time to run.  So, to help you out...a few signs your career may be going zombie:

You wander around aimlessly - It’s probably time to find a new job is you find yourself wondering around from task to task and not really engaging your brain.  What are you doing?  What are you looking for?  Work is a chance for you to use your brain and exercise your smarts.  You’re probably in a culture or company that doesn’t value thought if you find yourself aimlessly staggering through your day.


You eat brains - This one is important.  You are no longer to accept good ideas or engage in real conversations...basically, you eat brains.  You laugh, but it’s true.  We’ve all meet with someone who just says no to everything, never adds what we should do...and just destroys the conversation.  Zombie Brain Eating Coworkers...get a new job.

You take weapons everywhere - Well, not literally but you get the point.  If you find yourself always getting ready for battle or an ambush at work...not good, beware.  You really want to work in a place where you can debate issues on their merit and have a robust conversation...not have to bring your weapons to keep you safe from the brain eaters.

You’re constantly overwhelmed - Ok, so did you see World War Z?  The scene where the zombies totally overwhelm Israel freaks me out….crazy.  Anyway, a lot of companies with bad cultures have this kind of crazy non-sensical hoard mentality where one person gets infected with an idea….and boom, everyone goes nuts for it.  Bad corporate cultures are like cults or zombie infections…..bad ideas dominate and overwhelm anyone who gets in the way.

You’re friends keep disappearing - This one is kind of obvious.  In all of these shows/movies people die.  Friends just kind of go away or get left behind.  It’s time for a job change when all of your friends are quitting or leaving.  Attrition is the dirty secret companies don’t like to talk about...some attrition is healthy and good for the organization but bad companies have unhealthy attrition rates because people realize it’s not a great company.  If you notice friends disappearing….start looking around.

Ok, that’s it this week.  Obviously just a funny blog but the point is really serious.  Bad companies or bad cultures are just not cool and rather that fight the zombies...run and find a place you can settle down a bit and really grow your career.

Final note, if people at your company ever dance like the zombies in the Thriller video…..you should stay there because that dance is just amazing.